What’s Different About This Marriage Weekend?

What’s Different About This Marriage Weekend?

Over the years, Jan and I have led a number of marriage weekend retreats across the country.  But this July 26-28, 2013, we are co-leading the New Life Marriage weekend in Dallas, Texas, and it is quite different.  (Check it out at www.newlife.com.)  Before telling you what’s different about this weekend, here are comments from two couples who attended the last New Life Marriage weekend.

“Before coming to the New Life Marriage weekend, I was sleeping the garage.  I hadn’t spoken to my wife for 20 days.  On Tuesday–3 days before the weekend retreat was to take place–she finally spoke to me and said, “We need to go.”  She signed us up.  I booked the room and rented the car.  We drove 24 hours through the night to get there.  When it started, I was very anxious, very tired, and extremely skeptical. I couldn’t remember going more than a day without tension.

“The weekend was a big awakening and breakthrough.  As early as Friday night, God had begun to really speak to each of us.   By the end on Sunday, so much stress and weight had been removed.  Now we are able to look each other in the eyes.  We pray together, laugh together and I find myself smiling for the first time in a long time.”

The other couple said, “Before coming to the weekend, we knew we had no marriage left.  We didn’t live together and my husband wanted a divorce.  We had NO connection other that the necessary exchange of information.

“The weekend has been all that I could have hoped for.  I was taught, entertained, and loved by the speakers and my counselor, along with the great people we met who were in our group.  Since coming home, my husband is actually nurturing me!!!  We now have the tools and resources to make it a great marriage.”

So why is this weekend different?  Most marriage conference attendees sit together, listen and take notes.  Hopefully they talk about what they heard later in the room, or at least in the car returning home.

Not this weekend.  First, Jan and I co-lead several presentations.  That’s not what’s different.  It’s not even that Kay and Milan Yerkovich co-lead several other presentations.  It’s what happens when when our sessions end.  At that point, you as a couple go to a group with 3 or 4 other couples who are at about the same level in their marriages.  The group is led by a professional marriage counselor who is trained in how to work with couples.  What you had just heard in the presentation session gets discussed, taken apart, and applied in a personal way to each couple’s situation.  Questions are answered and deep issues rise to the surface to be finally dealt with.That’s what I think makes the difference.  Check it out, sign up, and meet us in Dallas.

Question:  What’s scary for you about attending that kind of marriage weekend?  What do you hope could be addressed in your marriage?

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7 Responses to What’s Different About This Marriage Weekend?

  1. Brenda says:

    What’s scary for you about attending that kind of marriage weekend? What do you hope could be addressed in your marriage? To be honest I love to hear testimonies of married couples and so happy for them that their relationship is better and continue to do the work, I would love to go and the scariest part for is that things would not change, we attended a New Life weekend in April 2008 and till this day my husband has made no effort to work on our relationship. I’m now to the point that I sion’t love him anymore and don’t want to invest more time in the relationship. I’m the one who has booked marriages retreats, counseling, pastoral counseling, mentors etc, etc and etc and I’m extremenly tired at this moment is only God who will do the miracle I’m just done trying and doing, I know I cannot change him and never will its all in God’s hands. IF I would be able to go I woudl like to address his attitude and choice of words and actions he has made in the past and would like to address that I need a a leader in the house not just a provider. Sorry I vent out to much but need to and thanks you for letting me. My prayer and hope for ALL the couples who are choosing to attend is that God will show Himself and always be there for them as long as the couples allow HIM to as well.

    • Denise says:

      Wow, I share the same apprehension as you Brenda, for amount I thought I wrote the letter regarding my marriage. Brenda, continue to pray, rest in God, I pray he will guide you and give you comfort and peace, may God stir your husband heart to seek Him, I pray God renew his mind, heart and restore your broken marriage in Jesus Name Amen.

  2. Sherry says:

    My husband is abusive emotionally and other ways, just not physically abusive. Would your marriage weekend be appropriate for us? I have read that marriage counseling usually does not work in abuse situations. He has adamantly refused counseling of any type but I figure it never hurts to ask.

  3. Pingback: Dave Stoop – What’s Different about this Marriage Solution Weekend | New Life

  4. Laura says:

    I’m concerned about the small group time. My husband and I need more tools to communicate. He is very shy and very private, and I am concerned that he would be very uncomfortable, and when he gets uncomfortable, he gets defensive, angry, and closed-off. I think we also have a certain amount of shame that we don’t have what we want. How are the small groups addressed in a way that my husband would feel comfortable.

  5. Karen says:

    I’m literally at the end of the rope – THE rope. I filed for divorce last week and just passed our 35th wedding anniversary. I have been the catalyst behind every effort to bring life to this marriage and I am done…..done with pornography, done with homosexual dalliances, done with emotional abuse…. done…… at least I think I am. If there is one last trick in the box to turn this around I will advocate to come but I’m desperately afraid that this flicker or hope (or is it just a wish) that things could be different will end in another episode of excruciating disappointment and heartbreak. I don’t think I can physically or emotionally withstand much more. Thoughts?

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